I’m not the only one that convinced myself that I could totally skate in real life just because I played way too much Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater, right? Surely I am not the sole delusional white boy who bought way too many Element shirts at Pac-Sun in 2001 and said, “Pfft, sure brah, I could totally grind that gnarly rail,” before putting on my comfy pants and watching four hours of Rocket Power on Nickelodeon from the safety of my couch. Well, if you ever wanted to put this theory to the test then you’re in luck because the Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 1 and 2 Remastered collector’s edition includes an actual skate deck. Maybe check up on how good your health insurance is first before making that pre-order.
Announced in the deluge of information from today’s sweet secret spot drop of information on the newest remaster of the franchise is a wicked awesome physical collector’s edition. As usual, The Internet’s @Wario64 had the capitalistic scoop, revealing a $99 collector’s package that brilliantly–or maybe, dangerously–includes a full-sized replica skateboard deck. And not just any deck, but the iconic Birdhouse Falcon 2 design all on a limited edition, signed deck.
Best Buy https://t.co/2q5ORC0E1h
A $99.99 collectors edition also announced, not listed yet pic.twitter.com/HlOipwb55I
— Wario64 (@Wario64) May 12, 2020
Now, I am typically the first one to say that collector’s editions are a big, stupid waste of time that often just junks up your house and life with more unneeded plastic. However, something about seeing the Birdhouse falcon and the words “full-sized deck” immediately caused Police Truck by the Dead Kennedy’s to play in my head. I dunno, guys: Maybe I can actually skate. Perhaps it is time to shred in a way that can only be described as “clean and NBD.”
The collector’s edition has some more goodies included (the contents of the digital deluxe edition), but if it doesn’t include a scratched up, burned CD of the soundtrack then I don’t know if it’s worth the trouble. Regardless, this whole shebang looks to be one of the rare few collector’s editions worth the scratch. (Note that it only includes the skate deck itself. Trucks and wheels are sold separately if you actually want to use the thing. Otherwise, it makes some pretty cool wall decor.)
…On second thought, I already have my comfy pants on and there’s a bunch of Nicktoons on Amazon Prime. Nevermind. Regardless, both the regular and collector’s edition of THPS1&2R comes out on September 4 of this year. Brah.
(Note that the collector’s edition only includes the skate deck itself. Trucks and wheels are sold separately if you actually want to use the thing. Otherwise, it makes some pretty cool wall decor.)